Motherly Love

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by Lena A. Lien © 2023

Father left us when I was about 6 years old. I never understood why he did that, how he could do that. Anyway, from one day to the next, my mother faced almost unsolvable problems. When he left, the breadwinner was gone and the household coffers were empty, our rented apartment was way too expensive, and mother didn't really have a profession or a job.

She had only me.

How had father once written later? "A feeble‐ minded cripple who will be dependent for life. All his life will be dependent, a care case from childhood on ...". Yes, that was me. Although I understood everything, but could never really speak fluently, they thought because from birth I had only two arms, which were much too short, with a total of eight bent, deformed and powerless fingers. I could hardly take care of myself. My arms were shorter than my fingers. I did learn later, over the years, many things, even difficult ones like dressing myself, but there were so many other things that would forever remain closed to me.

Mother now sat at the table night after night, drinking and rummaging through the cardboard box in which she kept letters and photographs. There was the picture from before I was born, where father wore his beautiful uniform and carried the big rifle, then a photo that showed him with the other knights in the war, sitting in a big tent and drinking comfortably. Later, mother walked daily to the railway station and waited for him for a long time; he then came with the broken leg and she was very happy, because now the war was over, although they still had nothing to eat then. But then I came, and father had his good leg and work again.

Sometimes he was sweet and cuddled me and lifted me in the air. Mother sometimes showed me the picture where I was still a little Putzi and Dad lifted me in the air and I learned to fly. But most of the time he was very angry with everyone and screamed loudly and drank even more. Then I always dreamed such bad things and climbed out of bed and ran to Mama, who comforted me. When Papa lay on top of her and squeezed and squeezed, I would sit very still next to her and Mama would gently hold my fingers until Papa had finished squeezing her. Or when he had screamed for a long time and Mama wigged his cock so he wouldn't scream anymore, he would stay very still until it made pee‐pee, but then he would scream again for Cripple not to stare so stupidly and I would duck behind Mama. Dad and mom always drank a lot and smelled awful, but I was always afraid of him, loved mom and stroked her hair when dad was lying on top of her and pushed her through again quite awfully tight.

Father was right, but I was still secretly very glad when he left. He could now take his anger out somewhere else, yell at someone else when he was drunk, and no longer needed to beat up my mother. I didn't mind the bruises much, but I always felt sorry for her when he beat her so terribly. She didn't scream, ducked his brutal blows and clenched her teeth. He was the father and he brought home some money from work. I kept praying to the Gotfatha at that time to punish him, to take us away, but the Gotfatha that everyone expected something from and who was responsible for it all, he had never listened to me. Until I became 6.

Mother cried horribly at that time, sitting at the table night after night and getting drunk. I knew then that drinking so much makes one quite stupid in the head, and mother cried and drank and cried again. I snuggled up close to her and tried to comfort her, but I could hardly get anything out except my stammering, which was hard to understand. Mother then smiled sometimes in tears and stroked my face as if I were the one to be comforted.

As the years went on, I slowly realized how much Mother had done for me. She tried in vain to get me into a school, but in this gray city, full of menacing bomb ruins and construction sites of dogged reconstruction and hectic bustle, there were no schools for children like me. She went desperately from office to office, often waiting there for hours to get more money for me; the care money was barely enough to pay the rent. Father sent us nothing, and mother cried because we never got a single red cent from him and could eat very little without that red cent.

Mother also ducked under these blows of fate, sitting night after night at the table and drank the cheap red wine until she brought me to my bed in a daze and then slumped in hers. We economized on food, did not heat every day, and sat on the table bench wrapped in warm blankets, close together, warming each other as best we could. Mother told me about the meadows and fields, the animals and the other people who were out there. Of castles and shining knights who had to rescue princesses from evil dragons, of fast cars and cruise ships on which smartly uniformed captains waltzed with ladies in love. She conjured up the summer sun and warm sunshine, or we breathed against the windowpane and painted funny flowers. Or I would paint the evil fire‐breathing dragon that was eating a man. Then mother had to cry again and I quickly wiped it away.

No, I never got to go to school, but I learned to write my name on the windowpane: JAN. Often and often I wrote my name, wanting to be a good and obedient student, but I did not understand so many things that mother told. I could count with my fingers, but when I was supposed to count ten or twelve, I couldn't imagine what this twelve should look like. Only when mother spread her ten fingers and I then stretched up two beaming, then we both laughed and were happy about the "mixed twelve". If I was then two times as old as now, then I am twelve, so the six fingers from now and then two more, I think.

Sometimes mother said that I had to be quite brave now, but she had to earn some money and leave me alone for a few hours. I was very afraid, because she usually never left me alone for more than an hour, and Mother cradled me in her arms until I stopped crying. In the morning she hugged me very, very tightly and left quickly. I remained sitting by the table, had put my only toy, the old bear, next to me and drew loud letters on the window pane: JAN and J and N and NA and JJ and AA. The old bear looked sullen as usual and nodded. I should write a B like Brigitte, that was my mother's name, the old bear mumbled, and I said defiantly that we had not yet learned the B, but only JAN. Then I drew again the fire‐breathing dragon that ate father and the old bear and I began to cry loudly. Mother had always looked for work and then I remained sitting dutifully until she came back and brought food.

Then I wrote for hours JAN and J and N and A on the window pane, tried to teach it also to the old bear, but the stupid guy just wanted to be held and snuggle up to me all the time. Sometimes when I breathed on him, I looked through the window pane at the gloomy houses and the pale winter sun that stood behind the towers and skyscrapers above the horizon. The roar of the city, that came from the cars and the streetcar and the construction machinery, Mother said, and from the many people who lived there, walking around and talking loudly to each other. We had sometimes gone for a walk, walked through some streets, up to the meadow where other children were and were playing. Mother and I usually sat on a bench and watched them; I couldn't join in because I fell down everywhere because I got dizzy right away, couldn't hold on, and didn't understand why I was swinging with another child. They did not like me at all, were often angry and mean and mother went there with me less and less.

As I said, those were the particular problems. I couldn't get dressed or undressed by myself, couldn't pee, bathe, or eat by myself, and I just needed my mother. Among the favorite things I remember fondly was bathing. When my father was still around, we sometimes bathed sometimes the three of us would bathe, the water always spilling over and all three of us laughing. Father would tickle Mother's breast or grab her buttocks. She shrieked with delight and teased him, plucked at the hair on his chest or took his cock in her hand and wiggled it around a bit, sometimes looking at me to see if I was busy with something else. But then the evil dragon came and ate the man and then the father was gone.

Mother and I bathed together until I was 8 or nine; the bathroom was — like the kitchenette — a partitioned‐off part of the living room, for beyond that there was only a little room in which my bed stood. Later, she bathed more and more often alone, pulling the plastic curtain. She hummed and sang and chatted with me a bit, told me about her girlhood, about school and her first dance. She splashed and pawed around in the water, kept silent and splashed for a very long time. Then she took me into the tub and washed me carefully. She explained that I had grown a lot and there just wasn't enough room for both of us in the small tub, I understood, right? I was disappointed and grumbled that it used to be the same with Dad and how we laughed all together and how she wiggled his cock. Then she became sad and said that it had been something else to bathe with the father, but that was no longer possible. Then she cried again and drank red wine and lay down on the bed and cried until she fell asleep. I sat half the night on the bench and cried and also slept until she woke up at night and put me to bed.

The pale winter sun was almost hitting the skyscrapers, and Mother was not here yet. The old bear was already very restless and grumbled that he wanted his snack. I scolded him, the fool, saying that we had to wait until mother arrived and prepared the snack. If he was hungry, then there was another apple, the mother had put three on the table for us to eat, and the old bear and I had already eaten two. But he grumbled and grumbled and did not want the apple, the defiant head.

At last, at last the key turned in the door lock, at last mother came home and sat down exhausted at the table. Only after a break did she shiveringly take off her winter coat and prepare a snack for us. I told a little about our writing, told her that the bear now wanted to learn to write B for bear and that I couldn't do it yet. Then I said that the old bear and I had argued about whether I was now 7 or 8 years old, which was right? Mother smiled and said, you are both right. I had already been 7 and would soon be 8. After 7 comes 8, all fingers. Startled, I said, no, not all, there are still two missing! Mother smiled sweetly and said, eight, that's all the fingers! In the night I woke up again from the bad dreams and mother took me to her bed, although I had long since had my own bed for a long time. But again and again the silly dreams plagued me and then I was allowed to sleep with her in the big bed.

Mother went to work every day now, away. I looked after the old bear, we ate our apples together and wrote diligently on the window pane. I also tried to make the beds nicely, but with only one arm and four fingers it just didn't work very well. Whenever I pulled on one end, the other end would get bent again, so it didn't turn out as nicely as Mother would have made it. Nevertheless, Mother was pleased in the evening because I had tried it. She had brought me a chocolate and I was allowed to eat it all by myself after dinner. She put a bottle of red wine on the table before putting me to bed, and then I heard her crying softly and drinking until I fell asleep. I woke up screaming from the bad dream, mother came in and took me in her arms. She was naked and had obviously already been asleep. I snuggled against her warm body as we lay in bed, and I couldn't fall asleep for a long time. Mother was very restless, wiggling her bottom back and forth and sighing a bit. I was already falling asleep and felt her wiggling and sighing as she fell asleep. I heard that often and found it soothing, then I fell asleep completely.

After some time, Mother came home early in the afternoon, the winter sun had not yet reached the high‐rise buildings. Her face was howled and the black eye makeup was smudged. She kissed me very sadly on the crown of my head and sat down, drank a glass of wine and cried. I was very scared and didn't dare ask what had happened. Silently she sat there and slowly the tears flowed down her beautiful cheeks. I pressed the old bear close to me and held him very dear, the poor guy was just trembling.

"I've lost the job again," mother murmured, wiping her eyes.

"Mr. Mader, you know, the one at the camp, he has — oh, never mind, I can't work there anymore! I don't know what's going to become of us now!"

Now she was crying again and so was I and so was the old little bear. I held him in front of my chest and rocked him reassuringly, I would protect him from everything, because he was my only friend! But mother I would protect her too, I hugged the old bear even tighter and had a very sad feeling in my heart because mother was still crying and drinking. That evening she drank the whole bottle. She had forgotten all about dinner because of all the crying and drinking. Then she got up a little unsteadily and made up our beds, when she looked at me, holding the old bear tightly to her chest, she said I could sleep in her bed tonight. When Mother had been drinking, she spoke very slurredly and walked rather unsteadily, bumping into a chair or the bench, but she didn't seem to feel it. I tried to help undress her myself and shook my head when she asked to get my pajamas from the room. Since I knew she slept naked, I wanted to sleep naked too. I hugged the bear to me and shook the guy into place, then she tucked us in.

Mother sat at the table for a while longer, then she got a bottle of wine from the pantry and drank another glass, very slowly. She smoked one cigarette after another, although she had hardly smoked before, and kept wiping her tears. My eyes almost fell completely shut when she unsteadily stood up and took off her clothes. I looked at her beautiful body as she lay down in bed with me, then she turned out the light and I immediately fell asleep.

In the middle of the night, I awoke to a noise. I had to get my bearings first, where I was and what had woken me up. Then I noticed that Mother was panting loudly and tossing and turning. I had palpitations and was very excited and turned my head over to her; at first I could see nothing in the dark twilight. Her hand, which had been dimly jerking back and forth between her thighs, paused; Mother gave a loud sigh and lay motionless. I remained still, still feeling my racing heartbeat and feeling that my cock had become quite stiff. I bent to the side, curled up so low that I could feel it with my fingers. That felt good. I pressed the old bear a little tighter against me, then I fell asleep again.

Mother now sometimes stayed at home all day. She cleaned and tidied the little apartment, washed all our clothes, dried and ironed the laundry, and then she bathed me. At the very end, as always, she would take my cock carefully in her hand, pushed back the foreskin from the glans and gently rubbed it clean, washing the cock from front to back. Then she let it go, but it remained stiffly erect. I felt my heart pounding, she straightened up and wiped the sweat from her forehead. Then I stood up and let her dry me off. Mother looked at my hard‐on and said, "Let's wait to get dressed!". She left me stand beside the tub for a while and went into the next room to get clean clothes. My stiffness now passed away all by itself and when she came back to dress me, the cock was hanging down normally.

These were lovely days, for mother was at home almost all day, doing the housework or playing with me. I was learning the B so that I could later teach it to the old bear, but that was a very difficult letter! Then we played counting cutlery again, but it was too much for me, because all together it was already twelve and then there were still four small spoons and all the knives left! Mother laughed brightly and said, "but we still have to practice counting cutlery!" I laughed, too, and let the old bear hop around on the table; Mother had to laugh even harder now, and I did, too. We had a really nice time!

However, more and more often she frowned and mused aloud that we couldn't make ends meet, we had to save everywhere and she sold all our things. We had to save everywhere and she gradually sold all our things. At first I was very sorry for my old toys, but I calmed down, because I was really only playing with the old bear. Mother gave everything to a children's home and was then able to do some shopping again. There was plenty of room in the closet again and where the refrigerator had stood before, one could now put an armchair and cook much more comfortably. I said that they could also sell my bed, because I preferred to sleep with her anyway, but it took almost a whole week before mother could decide to do that.

Mother joked that I would soon be 9 now, so all fingers and a cock to boot! We laughed splutteringly, and I said that this was a hoax, because everyone had ten fingers, except Jan! Mother became serious again and acted mysterious, going down to the old janitor more often and making me wait. But when she came back from shopping hours later, she had bought a beautiful birthday cake with candles to blow out and as a present a learning box with colorful blocks and shapes, and also a book where all the letters were shown in large letters, so large that I only had to put them on the window sill and color them in stroke by stroke! I screamed with joy and was so excited that I didn't know whether I should blow out the cake candles first or count blocks or paint letters! Mother had tears of joy in her eyes and hugged me tightly, pressed me very sweetly to her bosom and kept saying that I was her whole joy!

We played all afternoon and all evening and I was all sweaty from exertion with all the newness. Mother drank red wine and I cocoa, we had soon polished off the cake and ate the last of the slices as supper. Then Mother got up, swaying slightly, and said, "Off to the bath!" I was soon sitting in the hot water, getting lathered up and rubbed down. Mother joked and laughed because the birthday had been so nice, tickled me and I had to laugh terribly because I am very ticklish. During all this tickling and splashing, Mother unintentionally touched my cock, which had been stiff for the longest time. She paused thoughtfully.

"Wiggle, wiggling!" crowed I, "Wiggle, wiggling, as with father!" Mother had grown serious for a moment, then she took him properly in her hand and wiggled the little fellow in the water, and we both laughed. I found it very pleasant and wanted her to continue, but she stopped and then dried me off. That night I lay in bed for a long time, contorted and twisted and tried to stroke my hard‐on as best I could, because it did me a lot of good, even though I couldn't reach much more than the tip with my fingers. At night I awoke again to Mother's sighs and moans, to her wiggling and jerking, but I immediately went back to sleep.

A long time passed, during which I learned a lot, I could already draw many letters, eight or ten, and I could also count the cutlery, there were two Spoons, two forks, two knives and two small spoons, that was exactly eight: all fingers! Mother sometimes went to work, stayed away for a few hours, during which I diligently studied and counted with the old bear. In the evening she would sometimes bathe, quite exhausted, humming and splashing in the water. I was also bathed regularly, the cock made winks‐winks and mother gave me a big goodnight kiss every evening before she sat down at the table and drank red wine.

One day we got a new apartment, which I liked a lot at first because there was a balcony. It was a long time before I dared to go out and look down. I was scared because I was afraid of the depth and never went out on the balcony alone after that. There was no small room here anymore, only the big room, but it was smaller than the one in the old apartment. There was also no bathroom niche with a curtain as before, the small bathtub was on the wall opposite the balcony. But we didn't have many things and so everything had space. You could fold up the seat of the table bench, and there was room for all my study stuff. I was really proud because I had my own area to myself. Mother wanted to some curtain in front of the bathtub, but after some pondering she said with a smile, "..that we can do without a curtain, can't we, my little darling?"

The tenth birthday was again an event, I joked that it was now all fingers and two cocks, but I would only have one, maybe we have to take her two breasts instead of the cock? Mother laughed and wiggled her shoulders so that her breasts flew perkily back and forth under her blouse. We had another cake with candles to blow out, and I got a car that sparked as I pushed it back‐ and forth. I drove around the table all afternoon, had lots of accidents and lots and lots of deaths. Mother had already drunk a lot of red wine at noon, I had awkwardly held the cocoa mug with my little arms and toasted her, and now she lay in the warm bath all afternoon drinking a glass, humming and singing beautiful songs, while I made great journeys in my car and drove to the outskirts of the city, to the houses behind which the sun slept. Mother sang and splashed, drank glass after glass, and paid no attention to me because I was so absorbed playing with my car. I looked over to her sometimes, she was fondling her breasts and humming, then she put her head back, splashed her hand under the water and sighed heavily. I kept playing until the old bear and I got tired.

Mother got up and gave me a bath. After the wiggle‐wiggle I had to stand still until my cock hung limp, then she laid me down in the big bed and kissed me good night. I curled up sideways under the covers like a worm and stroked the tip of my cock some more until I fell asleep.

I awoke as Mother swayingly undressed, lay down beside me, and turned out the light. My heart was pounding wildly, rolling back and forth sleeplessly‐horny; mother murmured, "Shh, shh, sleep tight!" and stroked very gently over my forehead, although she had drunk very much.

I hugged her tightly with one little arm and tried to sleep; my little hard‐on touched her sometimes and I still saw the image of her naked body. Mother held me gently, said "Shh, shh!" and rocked me gently so that I would finally fall asleep. I also hugged her with one little hand and felt pleasant shivers when my little cock touched her. She cradled me softly humming, I buried my face between her breasts, my little one pressed against her thigh, feeling heart‐pounding the frizzy hair. Gently and lovingly she pushed my abdomen back, her fingers very gently touching my stiff cock as she slowly pushed it away over her thigh, then I finally fell asleep.

And dreamed the wildest things. Mother was wiggling Dad's cock in the bathtub, then lying in the warm water, rubbing her abdomen with her hand, making a loud splashing sound. Mother wiggled Dad's cock and it squirted into the water, splash, splash, splash! I held Mother's soft body tightly with my long, wonderful new arms, dreaming, I stuck my cock inside her, thrusting and thrusting, wanting to squirt all at once. With a thud, I woke up. Mother had turned on the bedside lamp again and lifted me up a little. My cock was all hard and had made a thick white slime on her thigh.

She got up staggering and wiped it off, got the wine bottle and then drank in deep gulps in bed, stroking my head. I lay at her side, tired and sleepy, the old bear sitting in front of the bedside lamp, making a little shade so it wouldn't be so dazzling. Mother kept drinking, looking at my cock out of dark, burning eyes.

I couldn't sleep and pressed up against Mom and my cock was all hard and throbbing, Mom drank little sips and let me slide up her thighs and snuggle into her hot hole. I nestled my hot face into the warm Dimple around her belly button. Mother kept drinking for a long time and her eyes swam when she looked at me kindly. She stroked my back and made a warm round nest with her open legs for little Jan to snuggle in.

I crawled higher to put my face between her soft breasts, and felt with my cock the warm, wetness in her tuft of hair where she always rubbed. It made my heart pound hard, the warm, slippery wetness, and I wiggled my butt a little, because the wet and warm flesh did my cock so good!

The bottle wiggled a little in Mother's hand because I was wiggling so much, and she said, "Oh, you're not done yet, big boy!" I didn't understand and said, "Yes, Mom!" and snuggled up to her, to her warm, moist flesh.

Mother resolutely took a deep gulp, reached under my belly with one hand and slowly stroked my cock. "Is it so fine, little Jan?" she asked and I nodded, blissfully closing my eyes because it felt so good. Mother stroked and kneaded my cock very sweetly and very finely, letting me snuggle comfortably in the moist warmth and all at once I saw flashes and the cock squirted out again the white mucus. Mother pushed me back a little and kneaded and squeezed him, the mucus splashes caught in her dark frizzy hair like flies in a spider's web.

I knelt in the warm, round nest and watched as the slime flies hung in the spider web and infinitely slowly became drips. Then I became sad and looked at what I had done. But Mother looked at me with blurry eyes and, murmuring softly, stroked my hair, pulled me warmly to her and stroked my back soothingly. There was a gurgle in her belly as she continued to drink and the Wine trickled down.

She turned out the light softly and embraced me gently. She held me close, pressed me to her, and stroked me gently. I didn't understand very much, but I was proud because now I could finally squirt properly, like Dad when Mom wiggled his cock! She laid me on my side and lay around me warm and soft, I felt the comforting warmth of her body like I hadn't in years, felt the tickling of her chest against my back. I lay securely in her lap and slowly fell asleep, while she cradled me for a long time still softly humming in a gentle rhythm and I rubbed my buttocks comfortably against her body, felt in half‐sleep, how mother gently stroked her abdomen, heard later her soft panting and sighing, felt her jerking and wiggling, until I finally fell asleep.

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In the morning, Mother was up late when I awoke. She kissed me very sweetly on the forehead and said, "Good morning, my little man!" Then I had a very, very fine breakfast, got a second cup of cocoa. Mother got ready and said she had to leave me alone, maybe she would get a job today. I sat down at the window again and looked out, wrote with the old bear for some time and often hugged him, murmured: "My little man!" merely mumbled and did not laugh as usual, for the silly fellow could not squirt, that silly one! Mother soon came back and beamed, she had gotten the job and was happy, because now we would not have to save so hard. But unfortunately the work was only in the evening, and mother put me to bed after supper and only then went to work. I almost never heard her when she came home, but we always slept late in the morning and had the whole day to ourselves.

Often now, I would sit in bed in the morning, look at my sleeping mother, and wait patiently for her to wake up. Sometimes the blanket slid a little to the side and I would gently feel her breast; it was round, warm and incredibly soft. Then mother usually woke up, smiled at me and lolling. "Good morning, little Jan!" were usually her first words, and the old bear usually babbled in a disguised child's voice: "Gud Mornin, lidle Jaan! Lidle Jaan!" and "Love Mami much!". She usually made coffee and meanwhile ran the bath water; I was bathed first and then sat at the table playing with the car or the old bear who always wanted to get his B painted. Mother would then sit in the bathtub for a long time, soaping herself carefully and humming and singing when she was in a good mood. Sometimes she would also lean her head back, close her eyes and splashed under the water until she sighed deeply. She liked to do that, and by now she wasn't paying attention to me at all, because I was playing or painting very absorbedly.

The next time I was bathing, I felt that my cock was swollen very hard. I begged and pleaded, "Wiggle, wiggling!" and "Wiggle cock, Wiggle cock!". Mother had earlier unconcernedly taken my cock and wiggled‐wiggled; now I was fidgety and impatient as Mother wiggled‐wiggled, bending my cock to the to the left and to the right. Somehow it was pushing me hard, but I didn't know why. Mother stopped wiggling and held my cock very still, a bright droplet appeared at the tip. I squeezed and groaned and squeezed, Mother said kindly, "Let it all out, little Darling, push it out!" and stroked my glans. I squeezed and squeezed, Mother gently pulled the foreskin back and forth a long time and all at once a thick jet shot out. "Go ahead, my darling, go ahead!" she kept encouraging me, gently stroking my cock. I gasped and squeezed, squirting again and again in a small arc into the water. When it stopped, my cock went limp, Mother shook off the remaining slime and washed it again. Then she hugged me tightly before drying me off.

It was quite a great feeling, I sometimes felt all giddy and felt my heart pounding when I sat in the bathroom and felt my cock get tight and hard and throbbing. Mother was initially indecisive about how to deal with this, stroking and caressing me, often making me stand next to the tub and wait for the swelling to subside. Sometimes, however, she would whisper in my ear to push it out, and then I would push until she stroked my cock and the mucus squirted right out. Sometimes she just pulled the foreskin back and forth a little, then it squirted longer and better.

When mother after breakfast lay in the bathroom humming, her head back and splashing, I sometimes dared to climb down from the bench and stand by the bathtub. I watched mother, with her eyes closed, tickling and rubbing her tuft of hair, getting all aroused and felt the hard‐on in my pants getting hard. Mother sighed deeply and paused with the crawl, but her butt wiggled firmly under the water. She flinched a little when she opened her eyes and saw me standing next to her, but then she smiled and stroked my little arm very sweetly. "Well, little man, what are you doing here?" I felt the cock throbbing and thumping and begged, "Wigglecock, Wiggle cock!" Mother smiled again and unbuttoned my pants, pulling out the stiff cock that was already all wet. I stood there expectantly and stretched my cock out to Mom over the edge of the bathtub. She clasped it very gently and pushed the skin back and forth a long time, I gasped and sweated and felt a hot wave rising in my abdomen. "Come on my darling, just squirt it out!" whispered Mommy, quickly pushing the skin back and forth. All at once I felt the firm twitch, then the thick slime squirted over the edge of the tub into the water. Mom held it into the water and continued to pull and wiggle firmly, letting the slime slap into the water in thick splashes until nothing more came.

Her work was gone again, for days she searched and had to leave me alone. I counted my toes and still the nose: that was eleven, and so old I was already, so another finger, and I become twelve. Mother sometimes had work again in the morning, but after a while that didn't work either. She searched for a long time, but nothing was found.

Once I stayed in bed in the morning, too lazy and too unslept to get up. Mother had wiggled very hard that night and woke me up, I lay there with my heart pounding and almost couldn't get back to sleep. She had to run quickly and said she would be back soon, then there would be breakfast and bathing. I lay awake for a long time and could no longer fall asleep, nodding off again and again briefly and dreaming how mother had moaned and shaken in the night. I was abruptly awake, felt how my cock was quite hard and already throbbing violently. I kicked the blanket with my feet away and writhed, sideways like a worm, stretching my bent fingers long to reach my cock. With the tips of my fingers I just reached the red cock tip, stroking and cuddling because it felt so good. Then I tried to push the skin back and forth like mother, it went a little bit, but although I pressed and pressed, no mucus came out.

For a long time I writhed and squirmed, almost always just reaching the tip of the cock and rubbing it, it was very fine and exciting. I heard the key in the door lock, mother came in, looked at me and put the shopping bag on the table. Then she came over to me and stopped, looking at me smiling as I writhed and squirmed and rubbed the tip of my cock. I smiled up at her and tried harder, showing her how I could already do it. She took off her coat and sat down next to me on the edge of the bed. She watched me for a while longer, then said, "You have to pack it really full, Jan!" I nodded and tried again and again, but my fingers were really too short, crooked and lame. Mother put her hand on my shoulder and pressed down hard. The fingers now reached all the way down my cock. I put the crooked fingers around it and pulled up and down. Mother nodded, "Yes, that's right, now pull firmly up and down!" I pulled and pushed the skin back and forth and felt how good it did, sighed and Mother pushed my shoulder even deeper. All at once I felt the slime rising hotly, my cock twitching and spurting the slime into my palm. I paused, exhausted, as Mother intervened and rubbed the cock quickly to finish, in bursts all the mucus splashed out. It was nice, I breathed heavily, stretched out wearily straight on the bed and let mother wipe me.

She had work again in the evening. During the day we lazed around, often lying in bed for a long time in the morning. The cock rubbing and squirting had now become a daily part of our routine. But it was always different and exciting, sometimes I would stand next to the bathtub and watch Mother, waiting impatiently until she was done and no longer panting so excitedly; then I would hold my cock over the edge of the tub, Mother would rub it really fast and let it all squirt into the water. Sometimes, when she was asleep for a very long time, I would sit up in bed and writhe around, pulling and tugging on my cock, rubbing the tip of my cock until I almost ran out of air. When Mother awoke, she would smile gently and help me by pushing my shoulder down. I was already able to do it quite well myself and by now I was already rubbing myself until everything was squirted out. But most of the time I would stop, exhausted, and then Mother would rub until I squirted. Sometimes I wanted to Bathing squirt and asked mother to rub me, then she rubbed my cock under water, where the mucus floated away in long white flakes.

Mother now had a job in the evening where she was allowed to drink a lot. Often now I awoke when she came home at night; loudly as never before she would unlock the door, stagger and clumsily plod to and fro, and bang herself giggling at the table or the chairs. Mostly she undressed, panting loudly, and dropped heavily into bed. I smelled the strong odor of alcohol, then always snuggled up to her tightly and said, "love you, Mommy!" and she cuddled and cuddled my head and held me tightly until we fell asleep.

Sometimes when mother came home and murmured that she was all drunk and aroused again today, we still cuddled and snuggled for a long time. She would sweat profusely and loll about, stroking and rubbing very quickly and firmly in the tuft of hair, sighing and panting as she did so, and hugging me wildly when her bottom began to wiggle and thrust. I also hugged her tightly, as well as I could with my tiny arms, buried my face between her sweaty breasts and listened to the reassuringly galloping beating of her heart, because when she wiggled so wildly with her abdomen, I was sometimes also a little afraid.

In the morning, she was usually serious and sad when she woke up and hugged me sweetly. "I was so intense again yesterday!" she would say, and I would nod and cuddle my face between her breasts. Mostly we stayed lying down and I stroked her until she smiled again. "Mommy, love you so much!" was usually all I could get out, reaching out my little arms and fingers to her and stroking her chest. She would hug me and then stretch out like Puss Purr: this was a game we played often and often for many, many years. She was Puss Purr, lolling around quite comfortably, arms out to her sides, and I would stroke her belly with my face and her breasts with my crooked little fingers, and she would say over and over, "Purr, purr, meow, meow, but that's fine, meow!" and loll back and forth comfortably.

I crawled around on her warm body, stroking her and saying over and over how much I loved her. I couldn't speak well or fluently then, but Mother understood everything. With this lolling and Puss Purr playing and stroking, I now regularly got a stiff cock. After a while, Mother knew what I needed and reached for me, jerking and rubbing my cock while I lay on her belly. With one hand she held me by my bare bottom and pressed me against her tuft of hair, with the other hand she jerked my cock up and down really fast and when it squirted she let it trickle onto her belly. I loved this very much and we played it often, because mother came home almost every night staggering and drunk, so that in the morning we played long hangover Purr and Squirt and loved each other very much.

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I soon became twelve, for my birthday I got a small farm with sheep and cows and chickens. Mother explained to me exactly what such a farm was, then we played together with the animals on the farm. I immediately understood the feeding, because the animals always had to get their breakfast. Then I took the calf and pushed it to its mother, the cow, and made it say, "Mama, please squirt!" and mother smiled and the cow asked, "But what do you want, my little calf?" and the calf crowded up to the mother cow and begged, "Please wiggling, mama!" Then mother dappled cow turned to the calf and wiggled it quickly. The calf fell on its side exhausted and was very happy.

Of course, I asked how it was with the calf, where it came from. Mother took the cow in her hand and explained to me that the bull was the father and the cow was the mother, the calf was growing in the belly of mother cow and when it had grown enough, it comes out here, under the cow's tail, and that is the finished calf, the cow child. I thought about it for almost the whole birthday and then forgot about it again, mother had to go back to her work. The next morning, when we had played Puss Schnurr again and mother had stroked my cock, it fell out. Cow tail, I remembered and asked if the children also came like from the cow. I was unsure, because mother had no tail at all at the back of the butt and I did not understand how the children could then come and were there.

Mother thought and then told that a daddy and a mommy would love each other very much and thereby daddy injects his semen into mommy. In the mommy's belly then grows the little peck, like me, little Jan and then comes out. I said that wouldn't work, because mommy doesn't have a tail like the cow, so where would little Jan come out? Mother thought and blushed a little. Then she sat up in bed and pulled her knees up. "Come closer, my little darling, I'll show you" she said and I bent down and knelt in front of her and looked at her tuft of hair. Mother reached with both hands to the tuft of hair and slowly pulled it apart. I saw the split there that I had seen earlier. She widened it now, and I saw a small slit in that furrow. Mother pointed there with her index finger and said that the father put his cock into this slit, like this! And now she put her index finger in very slowly and said, "Now father's cock is in there, it wiggles a little bit, and then the semen goes into the mother!" Mother wiggled her index finger like a daddy.

I could picture that and looked up at her. Mother stopped poking her index finger like a daddy, opened her eyes again and said, "Now it's squirting!" and pushed her finger deep inside herself a few times, "squirt, squirt!" then pulled her index finger out again and said, "The father pulls his cock out of the mommy, the semen stays inside and there then grows a little baby." Now she pulled the folds that were on the side of her vagina even further apart, the little slit now became a hole. "You see, out of this hole the baby will then come out when it is big enough!"

I had to lean over and looked into that hole again, shook my head decisively and said to Mother, "It's too small!" But Mother said that when the baby was ready, the hole would also grow a little and the baby could squeeze through. I looked at the hole for a long time until she closed her thighs, then I asked mother, "Mommy doesn't have a cock, so what does she use to wiggle?" Mother turned very red and remained silent. I became unsure, I had surely asked something wrong. Mother said, "Today my little Jan probably wants to know everything, huh?" and smiled kindly.

She had gotten a red face and her breasts were moving violently because she was breathing rapidly. She spread her thighs again, pulled the crease apart with both hands and said, "Look here, above, above the hole, there is a very small cock. That's the little cock that Mommy wiggles with!" I bent over and looked very closely. There really was a very tiny little hump, but not a real cock, and I told her so. Mother smiled and said that was a real one though, you could do quite well with it.

Somewhat disappointed, I straightened up, lay down next to Mother again, and snuggled close. I had learned a great secret, but that the children came out of this hole, I found very strange. But even stranger was that mom should wiggle with this little hunchback, I couldn't really believe it. I grumbled, "Will see, don't believe!" and mother asked, what? I said, "Don't believe that mommy is wiggling with this hump, no cock there! No cock there!" Mother laughed to herself and cuddled my head. I was unsure and said, "Love you, Mommy!" and snuggled in close. We dozed off and mom thought.

After a while, Mother sighed and put a hand on her tuft of hair. "Now come on, little darling, you can watch me!" I half straightened up and looked at her curiously. "Jan gets to see?" Mother smiled with her eyes closed and nodded. I immediately knelt up and crawled to her feet, she tightened her drawn up knees and spread her thighs. She looked at me for a long time, closed her eyes again and slowly turned red all over, especially on her neck, especially on her neck and face. Her hand now began to part the tuft of hair, she placed a finger in the furrow and slowly ran it back and forth, she blinked at me again, I nodded and watched. Mother closed her eyes and rubbed the crevice.

With one hand mother caressed her breast, with the other she rubbed the cleft. Soon the cleft parted more and more, the little hole became visible, and she reached out a finger and ran it back and forth over the hole, looking for the little cock. After a while she began to gasp and moan, now she had only one finger outstretched and was running it firmly up and down, sometimes her head twitched forward and all at once she moaned very loudly and stopped rubbing, sticking the finger very deep and firmly into the vagina. Her whole butt wiggled back and forth, slowly she calmed down again, pulled the finger out again and relaxed. I was quite fascinated, but I had also got a very strong stiffy while watching, although we had already sprayed out the mucus this morning.

I lay on top of Mom and rubbed against her belly, then pressed my head between her breasts and kissed her tender skin. Mom was still lying there with her eyes closed, her heart pounding hard. With one hand she caressed my head and whispered, "Yes, I know, and I love you very much, too!" She hugged me tightly and I snuggled up to her very gently and tightly, "Mommy, please wiggling!" Mother opened her eyes, looked at me and smiled. "Does my little Jan have a hard‐on again?" she asked, feeling along my body. Then she said, "Yes, we'll have to do something about that!" and very gently stroked my bottom, gently rubbing my body against her belly, blissfully enjoying her caress. I pressed my cock firmly against her and asked again, "Mommy, please wiggle!"

Mother pushed me a little lower by my bottom and opened my legs until I lay between her thighs and her frizzy hair poked at my little bag. Then she stroked my bottom with one hand, reached her hand between our bodies and rubbed my cock. First very slowly, then faster and faster, until I had squirted out everything. Then I sank forward and mother stroked me gently until I fell asleep quite tired.

It all went on as usual. After mother had shown and explained everything to me, a strong familiarity had grown between us. Mother noticed by herself when I had a hard‐on and wanted to squirt. She rubbed me as a matter of course, be it in the bathroom or while playing or in bed, in the morning after waking up or at night when she staggered drunk into bed. I did not like that so much, because there she was always fast and wild and tore quite firmly on my cock, until it almost hurt. Often it was better to wait until she had wiggled herself and then after me, because she tore no longer so wild.

.

Or when we were both reading in the afternoon, she in bed and I at the table with the old bear learning in a book, she sometimes put her book away, sighed deeply and quickly wiggled her little cock, and the old bear and I continued to learn firmly and only looked now and then at the bed at mother and her little cock, which she wiggled firmly.

The time passed, I had already learned many letters, even difficult ones like the Z and the S, the two were really to confuse! It didn't help when mother said that the S curled softly in the curves like a snake; I had never seen a snake or a curve and sometimes did it wrong. But I practiced long and with concentration. Mother, meanwhile, was sewing a thick curtain for the balcony door and then looked at me a little uncertainly; she had to tell me something.

This was always the introduction when we lost a job or got a new apartment. I played on with the car and drove the old bear quite far away, to a land where the knights wore shining armor and had shooting rifles and where the old janitor couldn't scold mother anymore. I was very strong and drove the car very fast. I ran over the cow and narrowly missed the calf.

"I have to go away for a few days, because of work!" said mother, and continued sewing strained. I said nothing, put the cow back up and immediately drove it down again. Too clumsy. Mother was silent too, then she continued: "I talked to Mrs. Wanek, that is the nice woman on the ground floor whom I know from work. She will stay with you and take care of you, she'll make your food and take care of you." Mother paused in her curtain sewing and looked up. "What do you think?"

I drove on as if frantic with the car and said, "Donn't believe and know no Mrs. Wanegg" and rumms, the cow had to bite the dust again! We were silent for a long time, the drive was long and the old bear was already very hungry. The calf cried piteously for the cow.

Mother put away the sewing things and stood up. "Come, little darling, let's go downstairs and meet Mrs. Wanek!" I got up sullenly and stood still, letting her put on my jacket and my shoes too. Mother looked at me bucking and looking like a fire‐breathing dragon, then she said, "I'm going away for a few days, just three days." Then she paused, searching for words. "I don't get enough money at work, I need to make more money for the two of us. I'll go to a man's house and get more money there, enough for both of us!" Mother looked down and waited to see if I said anything. The old bear was still bucking and I replied, "Need money is good, but Mrs. Wanegg fears me!" I took a deep breath, I haven't said such a long sentence in a long time.

Mother smiled and said that Mrs. Wanek was a very nice woman, had the same job as she did, and would certainly love me very, very much, I had nothing to fear at all. I looked up at her, saw her encouraging smile, and nodded. We went down the long, dangerous stairs, Mother taking good care of me and helping me. We reached the 4th floor, one finger gone, the 3rd floor, a second finger gone, the 2nd floor, another finger gone, and the 1st floor, all fingers gone. Then we went down some more stairs, there was already the street exit. This was where Mrs. Wanek lived. Mother knocked and we entered.

They talked for a few minutes, then I looked up at Mrs. Wanek. She was wrinklier in the face than Mother, about her height, and smiled often. After a while I found nothing wrong with it, we sat down on her bench and I was allowed to play with the cutlery. Mrs. Wanek had so much cutlery that I had soon counted all the fingers and there was still plenty of cutlery left.

Mrs. Wanek already knew a lot about me and asked how much cutlery I had counted. I said, "All twelve and one more. That's how old I am, all of Mom's fingers and one hand!" Mrs. Wanek smiled and said. "That's right, then you'll soon be thirteen!" Mother and Mrs. Wanek drank coffee, I got a glass of water because Mrs. Wanek didn't have any cocoa. They talked about everything that had to happen in a day, breakfast and playing and the apples for the old bear and me. When Mrs. Wanek asked about the sanitary, mother said she had to be helpful there, he would be in time. I asked what a sanitäää was. Mother thought for a moment and then said that if I had to pee, I should tell Mrs. Wanek. Oh, I said, and continued to play with the salt shaker.

As I was leaving, Mrs. Wanek gave me a big smack on the cheek and held hers out to me. I hesitated and looked at Mother, who nodded; so I gave her a kiss on the cheek, too. Then we climbed the many steps again.

I nodded when Mother asked me if it would be all right with Mrs. Wanek, if she could go away for the three days. I nodded and said that Mrs. Wanek's cheek tasted very funny, though. Mother smiled and said that it was just a bit of make‐up, and I already knew that from her. I was very sad and asked, "Mommy, are you going to stay for a while?" and she said she was leaving in a few days. I threw myself around her neck in relief and kissed her as hard as I could.

In the next few days I forgot all about it again, the days went by as usual, until one evening when I was going to bed mother hugged me very tightly and said that tomorrow morning Mrs. Wanek would come, she herself had to leave very early in the morning. I began to cry, Mother sat down next to me and hugged me, letting tears drip down her neck. I then watched spellbound as my tears ran down her neck and over her chest and disappeared into the gap between them. I continued to cry for a long time, then Mother undressed and got into bed. Immediately I snuggled up to her and pressed my lanky body against hers. Mother loved and cuddled me the whole evening, played gently and lovingly with my cock, stroked it until my heart pounded and let me go. I got palpitations and she then let me squirt very gently. She stroked me very lightly and softly until I fell asleep.

In the morning, the smell of fresh bread woke me up, I looked up sleepily and Mrs. Wanek was handling the table, fixing breakfast. I jumped out of bed and drank my cocoa. Mrs. Wanek made me a jam bread, which was still quite warm and smelled strong. After breakfast I said, "Mrs. Wanegg, must pee!" She went behind me to the toilet and undid my pants. Then she held my cock very lightly and directed the stream into the toilet. "You've got a big one!" said Mrs. Wanek, as she shook it off and packing it in the pants. I nodded and went back to playing, Mother had sometimes said I had a big cock too.

Mrs. Wanek and I played letter painting, the old bear was a little jealous because I liked Mrs. Wanek. After all, she worked with mother in the same job and also had such a beautiful, big bosom like hers. We counted cutlery and all our fingers and toes. She liked to draw and paint animals and people on the window pane with her finger, tell great stories about how the men in Africa shot at the lions and the buffaloes with the rifles. The buffaloes were cows with big horns and they always ate the little negro children and that's why they had to be shot to death. We ate our snack and in the afternoon we went out again to hunt buffalo. When I had shot a buffalo boom boom, Mrs. Wanek had to put a finger on the drawing, because she had red painted fingernails, and that was then the blood of the buffalo.

I had to go to the bathroom again, Mrs. Wanek came behind me again and held my cock, while I peed. Her light touch made my heart pound, and it stiffened a bit, standing firmly forward. I pushed my bottom back and forth a little and enjoyed it, how the cock felt in her hand. I was now pushing my cock back and forth in Ms. Wanek's hand very quickly. Mrs. Wanek took her hand away and I said, "Bath! Bath, breakfast, painting!" Mrs. Wanek slapped her forehead and said, "Oh, I forgot, I have to bathe you before breakfast! I have to bathe you before breakfast!" Then she went into the room and turned on the water. I trotted along behind her with my fly open, half my cock still hanging out. Mrs. Wanek looked, but immediately took care of the water again.

"Together, together!" I said and she looked up. I repeated, "Bathing together, together!" She got a little out of step and went to the bed, straightened the bedding again, and then turned off the bath water. I was undressed and sat in the water. "Bath together, together!" I crowed loudly, Mrs. Wanek stood beside me indecisively for a moment, then she began to undress with her back to me and sat down in the water as well. She had a body almost as beautiful as Mother's, but no tuft of hair at all; her cleft was a pink, deep notch between two mounds. Her breasts were large and round, with small bright freckles.

We sat facing each other in the water, but she didn't actually know what she should. I said, "Washcloth, soap up!" She knelt up, took the washcloth and rubbed me with plenty of soap, washing my hair and face, ears and shoulders. Then she soaped my chest and shoulders. I reached out my little fingers and touched a nipple; she paused and waited to see what would happen next. I stroked the nipple a little awkwardly and looked at her cleft. My cock stiffened and now stood half out of the water.

I didn't let go of her breast until I was very aroused and leaned back; my cock was sticking straight out, stretching towards her. I looked at her expectantly, she looked at my cock and got red cheeks. After a while, she lifted my butt with one hand and carefully soaped my abdomen. Firmly she rubbed the butt, then the bag and very lightly and softly the cock. But no sooner had she touched it than I was struck by lightning and the mucus spurted out of the tip. Mrs. Wanek jerked back a bit and let go of the cock, giggled and said: "My God, that's not possible!" But I had to keep on squirting and squeezing everything out. Mrs. Wanek was very happy and giggled loudly, holding both hands in front of her face and laughing while I squeezed dutifully. Then I closed my eyes and remained lying while Mrs. Wanek quickly drained the water.

Mrs. Wanek dried me and laid me naked in bed, covered me and said, "Sleep now, my little darling!". Then she ran fresh water, took a long bath and then dried herself. She had a hair dryer with her and hummed with it for a long time until her hair was done. Then she sat at the table for a long time and read in her book. She checked to see if I was asleep, wrapped a bath towel around her body and sat on the edge of the bed. Then she began to pluck out any hair on her body at length; mother actually did this very rarely. I turned around and watched as Mrs. Wanek put one leg up on the edge of the bed and plucked out the hair on her calves. It excited me greatly when she then put up the other leg and I could see her cleft and the big pink mounds quite clearly. My cock swelled again, my heart pounded hard and I felt the excitement creep from my belly to my abdomen.

Quietly I slipped out of bed and walked all around, Mrs. Wanek quickly put her leg down and looked at me in amazement. I placed myself right between her knees and stretched my hard swollen cock towards her. Mrs. Wanek looked again at my cock, then she looked at me and asked asked, "Do you have to go again?" and I nodded. She tried to get up then, but I shook my head. "Don't you have to pee?" asked Mrs. Wanek in amazement. I looked her in the eyes and then looked down at my cock, stretching it out to her even more. I didn't dare say anything, didn't know what the right word was. I stretched it out even further and touched Mrs. Wanek's belly with the tip. She smiled all at once and said, "Want to squirt again, right?" and I nodded, yes, right, that's what I wanted. "Squirt please, Mrs. Wanegg!" I said artfully.

Mrs. Wanek pushed me back a little, then said, "Do you like to squirt?" and I nodded again, not knowing anything else to say. I continued to stand forward and again stood between Mrs. Wanek's thighs. Now she carefully grabbed my cock and held it in her hand, examining it. "It's big!" she murmured and reached down with her other hand, grabbed my sack and held it in her warm hand. Then she began to rub my cock rapidly, back and forth, back and forth.

The bath towel came loose and fell down the side, I looked at her beautiful body and leaned forward further, she was cuddling and caressing my little sack with one hand, rubbing my cock very quickly and soon gasping with effort. Soon I was panting too, the tip of my cock touched the skin between her breasts, I winced and squirted out the semen in thick jets, it ran down from her breasts to the belly. She rubbed a few more times and it squirted again until soon nothing came. She let go of me and I took a step back, dazed. Mrs. Wanek got up and fetched a wet towel, carefully wiped the splashes from her belly and also cleaned my cock, from which it had still dripped a bit.

I lay down in bed and waited for her to tuck me in, then smacked a goodnight kiss in the air and said, "Nice one, Mrs. Wanek, nice one!" She smiled and kissed me goodnight too, then joined me at the edge of the bed. "You like to do the squirting, right?" she asked and I nodded. "When bathing?" she asked, and I replied, "It's nice, the squirting!" "You like to squirt a lot, don't you?" and I said again, "It's nice, Mrs. Wanegg, I like it two fingers times and then again" She smiled and said, "Now go to sleep, my little prince!" and finally covered me up. Then she put on a long, thin dress that was all open in the front, lay down in Mother's bed and turned out the light.

I missed mother very much. I lay there undecided and quiet for a long time, not daring to snuggle up to Mrs. Wanek. But in the twilight I saw shadows everywhere, maybe they were lions or buffaloes. I rolled around a bit, then rolled over to Mrs. Wanek and snuggled up. She stroked my head, I snuggled up to her and tried to sleep.

But I couldn't and couldn't fall asleep, my little fingers played with her nipples and I pressed my face against her warm body so I wouldn't have to see the shadows of the lions and buffalo. I felt her warm legs against my feet, kicked the thin dress aside and pressed myself against her side. Mrs. Wanek just lay there quietly and did nothing, did not gasp and did not rub her little cock like mother. I pressed my body against hers, slowly rocking my bottom back and forth and stroking her chest with my fingers until I fell asleep.

I awoke immediately as Mrs. Wanek got up very quietly, careful not to wake me. I panicked that she was going to leave me, but she just quietly walked over to the bench and sat down. I waited anxiously and tensely to see if she would leave me alone, holding my breath. But now she slipped off the thin, long dress and stroked her breasts, slowly spread her legs and began to rub herself softly. In the dim darkness I saw that she was just rubbing her little cock and now fell asleep, calmed down again.

The next morning I was already long awake, Mrs. Wanek slept and slept and did not wake up. I watched her, the thin sleeping dress had slipped and I looked at her body, her breasts. The blanket had wrapped around her belly, her abdomen was naked underneath. I sat up quietly, slid down and looked at her cleft up close. It was much thinner and smaller than Mother's, it was naked and hairless, but I couldn't see inside, couldn't see the little hole because she kept her legs closed.

She turned and lay on her stomach, putting one leg over the blanket. Her bottom stuck out round and full, along the crease you could see the little wrinkled asshole and under it the cleft with the wrinkled, brown labia. I became very excited by this, lay down and bent over and played with my fingers on the glans. It was a nice feeling, then Mrs. Wanek turned around again and put one leg up, now I looked into her cleft. I stopped stroking and quietly crawled around her legs, then carefully lay down at her side.

Mrs. Wanek awoke and smiled at me in amazement, said, "Good morning, Jan!" and quickly covered herself. I whispered, "Gudmorn Mrs. Wanegg!" and stubbornly kicked the covers off again, carefully rolling back to her side, snuggling up to her and waiting until my heart was pounding to bursting. Then I crawled onto her belly and buried my face between her breasts, pressing my hard cock against her belly and rubbing my bottom back and forth. She took my head in both hands and looked me in the face, "What is it, little Jan?" and I replied, "Squirt please, Mrs. Wanek!"

She looked at me puzzled, then laughed and said, "But we already did yesterday, my little darling!" I said, "Don't think so, Mrs. Wanek, now squirting please!" She smiled again and looked at me, then asked, "And how, I ask you?" That was easy to answer, I crawled back down along her body, kicked a bit between her legs until she opened her thighs a bit, slid further until my little sac touched her cleft and straightened up on my knees so that my cock stuck out in front. Now I waved my hands up and down and said, "There you go, Mrs. Wanek!"

Mrs. Wanek giggled, then looked along her body at my cock sticking out down there. She put a hand on it and mumbled to herself, gripping and rubbing a little, but not very hard. I lay down on her belly and closed my eyes, enjoying this game. The bag and the cock were right on her cleft, she was now pulling on it and I was enjoying this gentle rubbing. Finally Ms. Wanek had understood everything, she closed her eyes, rubbed very lightly and slowly pulled the skin back and forth.

I felt her thighs open slightly and pushed my butt forward forward, because I do not support her with my hand. Her cleft pushed back, so I backed away a bit again, but then pushed against it again. When she again pushed up, I slid a little further down, maybe that was better? Now my cock was just above the cleft, Mrs. Wanek rubbed and pressed it a bit against the cleft herself. Again she lifted her butt a bit and pushed up the crack, against the cock and rubbed slowly further. It did good, and it did good because Mrs. Wanek was pressing against the slit with the tip of her clit.

After a while I was already panting very loudly and slowly slid a little deeper. Mrs. Wanek sighed, the gap opened still a little and she slid now with the glans in this channel up and down, it was all wet and slippery warm. She rubbed and stroked with the glans in the gap more firmly up and down, I felt that she pulled my glans in the gap more and more often upwards and pressed firmly against her hump. She did this for a long time and sometimes sighed. I stiffened with a loud heartbeat and straightened up a bit. Mrs. Wanek rubbed the tip of my cock quickly and firmly on the clit for a long time until I began to squirt. I saw sparks before my eyes because Ms. Wanek was still rubbing my squirting cock firmly against her little cock until she winced and immediately stopped, pushing me back a little. One‐two drops splashed through the air and fell onto her thighs.

I remained squatting on my knees, Mrs. Wanek, panting heavily, covered her eyes with her forearm and her body shook as if she were crying. I was very sad and did not know what to do. "Mrs. Wanegg, don't cry please!" She listened, took her hand from her face and smiled at me, "I'm not crying, you stupid guy!" she laughed. I said affected: "Jan is not stupid, has only two fingers not and no arms!"

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Mrs. Wanek sat up and took me in her arms, hugging me to her chest. "No, that's not what I meant to say. I sometimes say silly guy to someone when I love him very much, it's meant kindly and sweetly!" I snuggled up close to her and whispered, "Jan is a silly dear fellow, but Mrs. Wanegg is also a silly dear fellow!" Then she laughed and cleaned herself with a cloth where the semen had splashed. I watched very closely as she spread the cleft with her fingers and cleaned it with the cloth. Then she dabbed my cock carefully.

That day we were playing farm, I comforted the poor calf who was calling for his mother, but the cow had hidden on the bench behind me. But then I felt terribly sorry for the calf and I brought out the cow, both meowed and barked with pleasure and played Puss Purr. I then tried to explain it to Mrs. Wanek, but she was very stupid and did not understand very much.

She told me to stand up in the water and soaped and scrubbed me standing up while I had to turn around. As my cock stiffened, she looked over with a smile and nodded, "I see it, I see it!" She washed off the soap, and my cock now stood out all stiff and throbbing. She sat me down in the water, frowned and said, "So, what are we going to do?" and cradled her head. I looked up at her a little shyly because she was acting so unsure and said, "Squirt please!"

She smiled and said, "Yes, my little Jan, we'll do that, of course!" and grabbed my cock. I smiled happily and stuck it out. She rubbed it very quickly and then let all the semen splash into the water. She let the water out and dried me off, dressing me again.

Then she read a book, and we played again, the old bear and I, until evening. After the snack, she put me to bed and read some more, drank some of Mother's red wine, and then she was done. She quickly undressed, lay back in Mother's bed in the long nightgown, and turned out the light. I had spent most of the time stroking the glans with my fingers and looking at her as she read, now I felt her warm body next to me and snuggled up to her. She soon realized as I rubbed my abdomen against her hip and felt for me. She stroked my cock very lightly and long and stroked my hair. Then she rubbed it quickly and let it all squirt out. I fell asleep almost immediately.

The next morning I woke up and I was alone, she was gone. I was afraid and fetched the old bear, let him snuggle up to me. Then I was still a little afraid and curled up under the covers, stroking my glans with my fingers. I almost thought I was going to squirt when the key was turned in the lock and Mrs. Wanek came in, holding two shopping bags. She stopped in the doorway, looked over at me and I kicked the blanket away a bit, curled up tight again and rubbed the tip of my glans with my fingers.

Mrs. Wanek put the bags down and sat at the edge of the bed, watching with a smile and nodding when I did catch my cock sometimes and rub it a bit. I said, "Don't go, now!" She smiled at me and felt for my cock. I lay up straight, spread my legs and let my cock stick out steeply. Mrs. Wanek embraced it and rubbed it very quickly, making me squirt almost immediately. She squeezed every time I squirted and squeezed out all the mucus. "But you have to squirt often, my little one!" said Mrs. Wanek and I nodded. Then she got up and said, "Now I have not forgotten: off to the bath!"

After bathing we played a little counting of cutlery, drew letters and after eating Mrs. Wanek read in her book again. I played for a very long time, then squatted on the floor under the table and played with the chickens and the calf. Sometimes I looked up and looked at Mrs. Wanek; looked under the table along her legs down to her underpants and that soon got me very aroused. I got a hard‐on looking in and soon had my heart pounding again.

I got up and sat down on Mrs. Wanek's lap. She put the book down and asked, "What is it, Jan?" I looked at her from below and said, "Please squirt, Mrs. Wanegg!" Mrs. Wanek smiled and remained silent for a moment, then she felt for my pants and said, smiling and shaking her head, "He's standing again, your big guy!" She unbuttoned my pants and brushed them off completely, letting them fall carelessly to the floor. I lay in her arms like a baby, my little hand touching her breast as she reached for my cock. Now she was rubbing it, first slowly, then very fast. I felt her breast under my fingers and let it squirt up high. Then I stayed lying there for a long time and she tickled and stroked my cock and my little sack until the cock went completely limp.

Later we stood on the balcony, though I was very afraid of the depths and looked down to see if Mother would come yet. All of a sudden Mrs. Wanek said, "Down there she comes!" and I stared at the street, but all I saw were many, many people. We went back into the room, and a few moments later Mother came in. I rushed toward her and pressed myself against her body, tears streaming down my face.

I had my mommy back.

Mother and I now often stayed down for a long time, looking through the new book she had brought. It was already my third book, with lots of animals and pictures of the nests and burrows where they lived. With most of the animals she knew where they got the little animals, but with some she pondered and said very silly things, that the baby animals slept in eggs and then crawled out. I laughed, because we had already cooked eggs together, there were no little animal in them, really!

Mother now often went to work with Mrs. Wanek and then came back at night with a strong smell of red wine, staggered and plopped into bed. Sometimes Mrs. Wanek would come during the day and stay with me when Mother went to work alone. Frau Wanek would then often want to bathe me again, even though I had already bathed before breakfast. She would tease and tickle me until I was sitting in the warm water with my hard‐on peeking out. Then Mrs. Wanek smiled and rubbed him very quickly, letting the semen splash into the water, and we played twirls with the white flakes in the water. I was very fond of Mrs. Wanek.

Mother asked how it had been with Mrs. Wanek and I said how dear Mrs. Wanek was when she bathed me and let me squirt. Now we often talked about it, because mother was very interested in it. Once we slept again for a very long time into the morning, mother lay there like that and stretched her bottom in the air, crossed one leg and snored. I looked at her butt hole and the cleft that disappeared under her tuft of hair. She woke up and we cuddled.

I remembered again now and said that Mrs. Wanek had been using my cock on her slit to rub. Mother pulled me onto her belly and took my cock in her hand, running it back and forth in her piebald hair and asked, "Like this?" I shook my head and said, "Don't think so, Mommy, Mrs. Wanek doesn't prick like that!" She paused and thought. I said, "With the cock up and down the slit, it doesn't sting like that!" Mother opened her thighs wider and was now pulling the glans up and down. I nodded and my heart thumped wildly, then said, "On the litlle hump, rubbing hard!" Mother nodded and sighed, rubbing the glans on her clit. It squirted immediately, and Mother stroked my head.

Later she asked again, and we talked for a long time about how it had gone with Mrs. Wanek. I also said that Mrs. Wanek had rubbed the cock on the little hump for a very long time until it splashed and then had not stopped, not until it twitched firmly and then she had cried, the stupid guy!

Mother said afterwards that it was quite fine, but then I should also try so long to hold back the squirting, then she would also have it quite fine like Mrs. Wanek. The next time I tried to hold back the squirting, but it came too fast again and mother smiled, saying that it didn't matter. But after a few days I understood and now she rubbed the clit with the tip of my cock until she winced. After that she quickly pulled my skin back and forth and I was finally allowed to squirt. That was very exhausting, but also very fine.

Then it was my birthday again and for the cake candle blowing Mrs. Wanek also came up, had her pieced glitter dress on from work and brought a box full of animals for my farm. Mother brought a book about the sea and lots of fish, I could imagine the sea as a big, really big bathtub and was very happy because that was the wide world outside the balcony. There were many new high‐rise buildings there again, and Mrs. Wanek said that this was an economic miracle, a "Wirtschaftswunder". I nodded, because the new skyscrapers and construction cranes covered the pale winter sun more and more, and that was a wicked miracle.

Mother now often came early from work with a man and Mrs. Wanek. Then Mrs. Wanek took me with her, because mother still had work with the man. Mrs. Wanek then made me sweet lemonade and asked if I wanted to squirt now. Mostly I wanted to, although I had already let the mucus squirt out with my fingers in the afternoon in bed. But Mrs. Wanek was always happy because she had already drunk a lot and was very excited from drinking. Then mother came and went up the many stairs with me. I counted soon after twelve also twenty thirty forty, but mother said I must not omit anything when counting.

Sometimes Mother came up alone with the man, because Mrs. Wanek still had work and could not take me with her. Then mother kissed and hugged me very sweetly and said that if I stopped for a while on the balcony and looked at the skyscrapers, then she and the man would quickly do the work and we would have a little money again. Then she put on my warm jacket and I stood on the balcony and looked at the skyscrapers and was very afraid of the depth.

Sometimes I would also turn around and peek through the curtain gap, the man had laid down on Mother and his bottom was sticking out and he would squeeze her quickly. Mother would stroke his back and then they would get up and he would leave but give Mother some money and pinch her cheek very sweetly or even just nod when he left. Mother then got me back in really quick and I played at the table while she quickly sat in the bathtub and washed his slime away.

From now on I no longer looked at the skyscrapers and into the depths, but peered almost always through the gap. Sometimes, however, the man was the mean old Mr. Janitor, who then sat on the bed without pants, mother knelt between his legs and sucked his little cock, after which she rubbed him until the slime came out and she wiped him off. She was always very serious afterwards and drank a lot red wine.

Mother was very embarrassed when I asked her why she licked the janitor's cock. She thought and said we don't always have enough money for the apartment rent, but when she does it, he doesn't scold and gives a rest. I asked her if she also wanted to lick my cock, but she said "Brrr!" and that it was very bad, she didn't want to do it so much. I was very angry with Mr. Janitor, because mother did not want the licking at all.

Mother asked if that was very bad for little Jan when she brought the men into the Apartment. I said that I was afraid of the depth of the city and the street. She stroked my face and said that I was a very dear Jan and that she loved me more than anything. Then I loved her more than anything and wiggled my little hands, threw her kisses through the air and we laughed heartily together. I told mother that the old bear always peeked through the curtain gap and watched the men squeezing or mama riding on the man. But I was also very fond of the old bear and pressed him to me I pressed him against me so that he would not be afraid of the depth of the street and the man who was pressing mummy. Mami turned a little red and sad, because now there was no other work and we still needed the money for life.

Mother made me a nest of quite a few blankets on the balcony, the chair was our fortress and she turned it away from the depths, so I looked at the curtain and waited, the old bear pressed against me, until mother came to fetch us both up again. Then we had hot cocoa and sometimes an orange or Christmas cookies, which I loved so hot. But usually Mrs. Wanek came and took us downstairs, where the old bear got lemonade and brown chocolate cookies, and so did I.

Mrs. Wanek would say how brave my mother was, doing everything she could to get us by in these bad times. I shook my head because I didn't understand anything, but she said that she was braver than all the knights in shining armor, scraping together every bit of money she could so that I would have enough to eat and warm clothes to wear. I nodded and said I loved Mother, even more than I loved the old bear or Mrs. Wanek, the silly fellow.

One day Mother stayed at the table again for a very long time, looking at the old photos with Dad in the box one after the other and drinking a lot of wine, crying a little. Then she came quietly to bed and I cuddled up to her and comforted her. She hugged me and stroked my back, my butt, and soon I had a hard hard‐on. I loved mother very much and lay down on her belly, cuddling my face very tightly between her breasts and cried too, because she was still crying and sniffling a bit. We lay there and caressed each other and I rubbed my hard‐on against her belly.

She reached down with one hand and guided it into the small bowl, I waited to see if she would let it slide up and down now, but she just sighed and rubbed the little nipples of her breasts, as she always did when she had drunk a lot and had become horny. I had to squirt soon though and jostled my hard‐on back and forth at her cleft. She sighed with her eyes closed and lolling like the Tomcat Schnurr, who opened his paws meowing even though I was lying on top of her; all at once I slid in and my cock slid all the way into Mama's hole.

She immediately stopped and looked at me with big, blurry eyes. I felt it all warm and slippery, comfortingly slippery, and pushed in and out a little. Mother took my head in her hand and stroked my face; I smelled her breath, which smelled strongly of red wine. Her eyes watering, she stroked my back and then my bottom. I pushed in harder now and pulled out again, like Dad and the other men. Mother sighed deeply and said, "Don't squirt, little Jan, don't squirt inside!" I held it back the whole time and pushed harder and harder, mother sighed louder and louder and pushed me deeper into her by my bottom.

For a long time she held my head pressed to her chest and pushed my bottom, now she gasped quite loudly and sighed in between: "Dear little Jan, dear little Jan!" and I also whispered "Dear Mommy!" and continued to squeeze her. She murmured that this was very good and tensed up, her hole pinched my cock tightly, and now I could no longer and the semen splashed into Mommy, she pressed me to her by the butt and held me until I had calmed down completely.

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We slept for a long time and I woke up and Mom was still lying there sleeping. I ran a finger along her back, to her buttocks stretched upward and continued running my finger along the butt crack to her slit, tickling the hair, and Mother murmured in her sleep. I stroked her labia and got the hard‐on again. Mother murmured and kicked slightly because I tickled her with my fingers. Then she rolled over and murmured, "Good morning, little Jan!" and I whispered back, "Gudmorn, dear Mommy!" Then she looked at my cock and asked, "Was that good, yesterday?" I nodded and waited a bit, then said, "Want it again, Mommy, was very nice!" Mother shook her head and said she was the mother after all, she probably better do it by hand again and then really did it.

But one morning she gave in because I had stroked her awake for a long time and made Puss Purr. I begged and pleaded while she lolls all tight as Puss Purr, then she said sweetly, "Come on, Come on, silly!" and I rolled onto her belly. When my cock tip did not immediately find its way into her little hole, she helped me with her hand and put it in with a deep sigh. Then she said, "Hold back nicely and don't squirt inside, please don't squirt inside!"

So I pushed and pulled my cock, clenched my teeth tightly, and soon Mother helped me with a hand on my bottom to slide back and forth faster, we were panting harder and harder. Mother twisted and squirmed and gasped, so fine was it and I should squeeze even harder, she whispered. I did my best to squeeze her even faster and harder until the little hole pinched me tightly again. Mother cried out softly, moaned and pushed me back, my cock was all swollen hard and slipped out. Mother sighed loudly, "I'm so happy, little one!" and her body still quivered as Mrs. Wanek had quivered. I was still kneeling and holding back, a droplet already detached from the tip of my cock, when Mom reached between my legs and rubbed once‐twice on the cock, then I could immediately squirt and all the semen ran over her warm belly.

Over time, I instinctively understood that men liked to come to her for squeezing, because the squeeze was very fine. For a long time she only wanted to do it with her hand and not squeeze right away with me; it took many days before she finally loved it as much as I did. Now when I said "Please squeeze, Mommy!" we would lie down in bed, cuddle, and then I would push and squeeze Mommy. Most of the time I was able to hold back long enough, except when she had been drinking a lot, then she always pushed me hard into her until I had to squirt inside. Now she soon loved it as much as I did and we squeezed as often as we could.

Most mornings we stayed in bed and I squeezed her, often and often. Mother gasped and squirmed, whispering how much she loved me and I loved her too. I held back the squirting for a long time until she was finished and made me squirt hard with her hand. Some days she wanted it quite often and I sometimes agonized a lot until she finally finished.

But I much preferred it when she was very drunk and then squeezed me tightly inside her. Then I puffed like the bear or the buffalo and squeezed her really fast, mother squirmed under me and moaned softly. When she was done, then I pressed firmly further and she held my butt pressed tightly against her until I jerked and squirted and everything ran into her. It was nice to lie on top of her, panting breathlessly, and hear her heart pounding.

One evening mother took me down to Mrs. Wanek's and she had to sit by the table and take care of my toys and books. Mrs. Wanek was already quite drunk and giggling when mother brought me to her. She was wearing a sparkly nightgown that, like the other one, was unbuttoned in the front, and she was drinking wine. When Mother had gone, Mrs. Wanek leaned back on the sofa and said I could come for a shot now. I dutifully followed and climbed over to her, sitting down next to her. She took off my pants and then immediately started rubbing. I sat uncomfortably and knelt up, my cock got close to her face. Mrs. Wanek opened her mouth and, to my shock, shoved my cock inside. It was warm, wet and her tongue tickled.

I said, "Mommy says that's all ugh!" and Mrs. Wanek gurgled, she couldn't find it. Then she rubbed the cock that was in her mouth and sucked on it with her velvety soft tongue; it was so fine that it came right to me. I said, "It's about to squirt, Mrs. Wanek!" and she nodded, winked her eyes happily, and continued to rub firmly. I tried to pull it out, but she held me down with her hand, and so it all squirted into her mouth, and she kept licking wildly with her tongue while it squirted. Then Mrs. Wanek let the cock slip out of her mouth and spat the semen in the hand, wiped everything and laughed.

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"Well, did that feel good, little Jan?" she asked, and I nodded. Then I said, pressing into the hole is also very, very fine. Mrs. Wanek stumbled, then she smiled and said, "Yes, of course!" and whether I could already do that. I said nothing, because mother had forbidden to talk about it.

We read and had breakfast again, although it was late at night. Mrs. Wanek drank wine and gave me a lemonade, plus a cake from which I had to cough because the crumbs stuck in my throat. Mrs. Wanek came around the table and patted me on the back so I could cough up the crumbs. Then she looked over my shoulder and said, "Your cock is still swollen, big guy!" I told her she was a love too and that I would like another shot, please! Mrs. Wanek smiled and put her hand on my cock, but I shook my head and said, "Squeeze in the hole, please!" Mrs. Wanek looked at me questioningly, I repeated again, "Push the cock into the hole, please!"

Mrs. Wanek got hiccup after hiccup and sat down on the sofa because of the hiccups, quickly drank a glass of wine and asked, "You like to stick your cock in my hole?" I thought for a long time whether that was the right thing to do, then I nodded uncertainly. Mrs. Wanek leaned back and said kindly, "Well, come on then, little Jan!"

I obediently got up and walked around the table, placing myself between Mrs. Wanek's legs and laying on top of her as best I could. She groaned and laid us both lengthwise down. I lay comfortably on her belly, rubbing my cock against her naked cleft. Pressing back and forth, pressing it into her cleft, trying to get it into the little hole. Mrs. Wanek mumbled and then helped it along with her hand, sighing deeply when it finally went in. Her big eyes looked at me, "Is yours big though!" and I nodded, that was true, because mother kept saying it too.

But then she held her breath really tight because I was now starting to squeeze her quickly. She wasn't holding me by the bottom, so I clung to her side as best I could with my fingers, pushing and squeezing as best I could. I should probably hold back for a long time with her too, so I kept telling my cock not to squirt yet and pushed hard and hard.

Mrs. Wanek closed her eyes and gasped loudly, taking a deep breath, and I lay with my face on her chest and heard how she soon got the palpitations. Her little hole slowly contracted tighter and tighter, I felt the clasp and how her butt was firmly shaking. Then she wiggled firmly up and down and screamed a little bit, I saw Mother standing in the doorway watching us with wide eyes. I smiled with my face distorted with effort and sent her a kiss in the air. Mrs. Wanek threw her head wildly back and forth and expelled the air with a snort, while I now pushed even harder. Mother came around the table, gently lifted me and pulled me out of Mrs. Wanek so the squirts wouldn't flow in. She held my cock in the warm hollow of her hand and caught the drops so they wouldn't fall on the carpet.

Mrs. Wanek was lying there with her legs spread and her crack open, still squirming, hadn't even noticed Mother yet. Mother sat down with me on her lap and looked at Mrs. Wanek's cleft, which slowly stopped shaking. Then Mrs. Wanek opened her eyes, and Mother said, "Irene, please leave the boy alone, he can get some!" I didn't know what I could get, but Mother was very serious and Mrs. Wanek nodded with a red sweaty face that she had understood and pulled her long sparkly dress back into place.

Mother gently stroked me on the head and slowly dressed me. I was unsure because the two women were angry with each other and said, "Mommy, I love Mrs. Wanek very much and I love you too!" I snuggled up. "Did Jan do something wrong?" I asked again, pressing my head against Mommy because I suddenly felt like crying. Mother stroked my hair again and said softly, it's all right, we all love each other very, very much. Now I was satisfied and took the old bear from the table, pressed him against me and said that he was a very silly little fellow. Mrs. Wanek said we don't do that anymore, but that was a lie, because we did it all the time.

I studied dutifully in the new book, learned the whales and the herrings, but also the sharks with the sharp teeth that could even eat a buffalo when it came to the trough to drink. In the summer, Mrs. Wanek gave me a beautiful big bear, he became the chick from the old bear and the two quickly became friends. Mother kept encouraging me to teach the two to talk and so the chick had to learn to speak beautifully to its mother, the old bear. It was not allowed to bathe, because otherwise the fur could fall out, but it often lay down on the old bear and squeezed it very sweetly and for a long time. I too, hugged mother and Mrs. Wanek very tightly and lovingly, it was a very nice time and not so many men came to our apartment to squeeze mother anymore. But I did it mostly with Mother, because she liked it very much.

Many days after that I was with Mrs. Wanek, I stayed with her all afternoon because Mother had to go to work. Then Mrs. Wanek started pressing right after mother left, and we pressed the whole afternoon one after the other, she couldn't stop and sucked my cock during the break, that upset me right away and then we continued pressing again. In the meantime I didn't care that Mrs. Wanek screamed and howled quite loudly, while mother did it only quietly. Mrs. Wanek said that she was screaming a little because it was so beautiful. So I watched her as she tossed and moaned violently, but because it was beautiful, as she said, I went on and pushed her very hard until it squirted. But when we had already done it a few times, almost no more mucus squirted out, but Mrs. Wanek said it didn't matter and I should keep fucking her.

I was picked up by mother and when I got to the top I said contritely, "I fucked Irene today many times because it was quite fine, but I didn't get anything!". Mother had to laugh and nuzzled my head so that I was no longer contrite at all. Now I knew that it meant fucking properly. Mother said that I was a good boy.

She worked magic with her hand and had a new book for me, all glitter‐wrapped, about cities and mountains and lots of forests. It was a children's atlas, she explained, with all the countries on it, including ones like Africa and the desert. I looked at the beautiful pictures of the deserts and the icebergs and penguins in Africa, asked why the dogs pulled the dog sleds through the snow and where the knight castles and the land of the fire‐breathing dragons were. Mother had to search a long time before she found the castles and the fire‐breathing dragons that spewed high fountains of steam from the geyser and sent glowing lava pouring down the mountain.

This was the best fifteenth birthday I ever had. I was now already much bigger than mother and in the evening, when all the cocoa was out and the cake candles were blown out and mother made a "Cheers, Irene!" and "Cheers Brigitte!" with Mrs. Wanek, I was also allowed to drink a small sip of the wine and then the whole glass, because we were all already laughing so merrily and Irene said, "Oh Brigitte, what more do we actually want for life?" and I had to cough from the wine. Then they were both very drunk and laughed because I wanted to drink another glass and already had very red ears.

I sat down on Mother's lap and snuggled up because I was very dizzy and because Mother was crying a little. Irene kissed mother on the mouth and stroked her very sweetly, then she said rather mumblingly, "Brigitte, you are the bravest mother I know!" Then they drank on for a long time, and I sat on Mother's lap and felt my hard‐on getting stiffer, and Irene kept kissing Mother in the mouth with the tongue.

I whispered in mother's ear, "Like to fuck now, mommy!" and kissed her ear. She winced because it tickled her very much, then whispered back, "In a minute, my darling, in a minute!" But Mrs. Wanek, the Irene, laughed and patted Mother's arm, "Don't do anything to yourselves because of me, it's okay like this!" Then she took me from Mother's lap and carried me to bed, although I was already almost too heavy for her. She undressed me and covered me up. Mother and she were still drinking, and I said impatiently, "Mommy, please want to fuck!" The two of them looked at each other, then Mother came and sat with me on the edge of the bed. I writhed and squirmed under the covers and almost couldn't stand it anymore.

Irene also came and kissed mother again very hard and stroked her breast. Mother giggled drunkenly, then Irene stripped her naked too and she lay down in bed with me. Very quickly I rolled on top of her and put my cock into her vagina. Irene sat down at the edge of the bed and watched us fuck, stroking mother's chest and thighs.

Later, when I was already fucking Mother quite hard, she also quickly undressed and sat cross‐legged on Mother's bed, watching us and rubbing her clit. Mother hugged Irene's hip and moaned, "My God, that feels good!" and gasped because I was fucking her very well. Irene stroked Mother's breast and quickly continued rubbing herself, twirling Mother's nipple with two fingers as she moaned softly and rolled passionately. I had to squirt now, mother pressed my buttocks with her hand against her and let everything run into her. Then I slowly rolled off her belly; Mother hugged me very gently.

Irene groped for Mother's cleft and rubbed her clit back and forth very quickly. Mother gasped as Irene stuck a finger in her little hole and firmly ran it in and out, then Mother came to the end, rolling groaning and moaning to the side. Irene looked up at me and gasped, "Come on, do it to me, little Jan!" and I looked uncertainly at Mother. Mother lay very soft and tired there and nodded mildly smiling.

I crawled over to Irene and knelt in front of her. My cock was still half flaccid, but still quite large. Irene rubbed it a bit until it was hard again and quickly directed it into the little hole. I was now lying on her belly and tried to hold on with my hands, thrusting hard. Mother reached over and supported me by holding my bottom and pushing forward. Irene squirmed and moaned quite loudly, but then I could take no more, knelt up and plopped my cock out as Irene's abdomen just began to waltz firmly. Mother kissed Irene firmly in the mouth and rubbed Irene's clit, she pushed her abdomen firmly upwards and groaned like mad, because mother was now jerking very hard and Irene's body twitched and quivered. Then Irene let out a loud scream and mother let go of Irene's clit only when she stopped twitching.

All three of us gasped and fell asleep tightly embraced, so beautiful was this birthday. In the morning, Mother was still asleep, but Irene was already awake and when she saw me awake, we tickled each other and stayed quiet so Mother wouldn't wake up. Irene drank a big glass of water and moaned, her head pounding like a hammer, then looked to me playing with my cock under the covers. Quickly she slipped under the covers to me and whispered, "Let's do it, real quick, while Brigitte is asleep!" I slid on top of her and fucked, but when she moaned loudly, Mom awoke and looked sleepily over at us. She smiled as I squirted hard into Irene's vagina, then went back to sleep while Irene and I caught our breath.

Mother was lying with her back to us and must have been dreaming sweetly, because she stuck her bottom out wide and sometimes rubbed her abdomen against the blanket she had wedged between her legs. Irene stroked her bottom and very gently ran a finger up and down Mother's buttocks. Mother mumbled a little and stuck her bottom out even more, I sat up and looked at her little butt hole. Irene stroked her more and more and ran her finger up and down Mother's cleft, teasing the labia on the side with her finger and stroking mother with the other hand over the buttocks, stroked her small asshole.

Mother spun around sleepily and put her bent leg all the way to the side, opening wide and stretching her arms out to the sides. "Puss Purr!" she murmured, lolling comfortably as Irene gently stroked her tuft of hair and clit again. Mother grunted and mewed as Irene now widened the cleft with her finger and rubbed the clit with gentle rubbing. Then she looked up and was a little confused, but Irene kept going and Mother closed her eyes again, murmuring pleasantly. Now Irene knelt between Mother's legs and licked the cleft with her tongue. Mother opened her eyes. "The boy, no, don't, Irene!" but Irene kept on licking and Mother closed her eyes again.

Irene now opened Mother's cleft with both thumbs, and now I saw that the clit was protruded like a very small finger. Irene licked around it and mother squirmed and lolled, Irene licked and sucked on this tiny little finger‐hump and mother was soon panting, as if fucking. Irene sucked for a very long time and Mother's abdomen was soon heaving violently, she jerked her legs violently and Irene had latched onto her clit and was sucking it hard and Mother was crying out softly "Oh my God, oh God oh God!" She yanked Irene's hair and tried to push her away, but Irene kept going, as I did with her when she screamed and squirmed.

Mother nudged Irene's head to the side, opening and closing her legs quickly one behind the other. Then she dropped her knees to the side and lay sprawled like the frog in my animal book. I watched curiously as her slimy, wet flesh quivered, twitched and trembled, but the clit was no longer visible. Irene wiped her mouth and laughed, "Hey, that felt good, didn't it?"

Yes, that did mother good, because later, when I was sometimes already too tired to fuck, Irene and she kissed each other in the mouth, cuddled and sucked each other very long and sweetly and rubbed each other.

Unfortunately this birthday was not repeated very often, Irene was very poor like mother and had to work a lot to get money. Once, when mother had a man with her again and I was with Irene, there was a knock and a man looked in. Irene kindly invited him in and they whispered. Irene shook her head and said that the boy was a cripple, then she looked at me and pressed her lips together so that I wouldn't say anything. I nodded and remained seated.

Irene sat me down on a chair in the corner of the room and whispered to me to sit still and not to move, not to say anything. I nodded and Irene went back to the table, sat down on the sofa. The man put bills on the table and looked uncertainly at me a few times, but Irene turned his head around again and played with her hand on his pants. Some time later she opened her long dress and took off her panties, sat down with her legs spread and waited.

The man lowered his pants and let his cock dangle out. The cock was not as long as mine and not as thick, but small and crooked. He stared at the naked Irene and rubbed his cock until it was quite stiff, then he bent over and stuck it in Irene's vagina. She acted very mendacious and as if she was already very excited, in between she winked at me and laughed a bit. The man fucked a couple of times, then Irene pushed him out and it spurted a little from his cock, but not much. Irene reached over again and rubbed him hard, but nothing came. Then he quickly put his clothes back on and scurried out again.

Irene squatted down next to thebathtub and washed her vagina quite conscientiously. Then she beckoned me to sit back down at the table. I drank lemonade and said, "Was tiny, the cock!" Irene laughed and said, yes, that was the usual thing, the man only had a little tiny one, and we both laughed. I said, "Why do you have to do Irene mendacious, all mendacious and winked?" Irene thought, then she said that men like it when the woman moans and gasps quite a lot, that's good.

I didn't understand and asked, "When Jan fucks and Irene moans, too?" Irene took my head in her hands and hugged me sweetly. "But no, my little one, you are the best! That's when Irene moans, because it feels so good!" I wasn't quite reconciled yet, "Jan his cock is big enough though?" and Irene laughed in my ear, "But yes, my little silly, yours is big and thick and fucks well, better than all the others!" She kissed me on the mouth and looked me in the eyes laughing and I was very happy and proud.

I got up and went to the sofa and we fucked very hard, mother came in and sat at the table, smoking some cigarettes until Irene was done. I smiled at mother and continued to fuck as hard as I could. Mother smiled and stroked Irene's hair sweetly as she moaned and jerked loudly and cried a little until it was all squirted inside. I remained lying on Irene's quivering warm belly, listening to her fast heartbeat and my cock still twitched a little inside her, it was very fine! Irene told mother what we had talked about and mother suddenly had tears in her eyes and said that Jan was her sweetheart. Irene gently stroked my head and said with a smile that she could feel exactly how it was still twitching a little bit in her vagina.

"You know, Brigitte, if we earn some more, we could take a trip with Jan one day, maybe even to the sea!" and Mother nodded, but then she became sad and said that there would never be anything left to save and that she soon couldn't stand it all anymore. I was very sad because Mother was so sad and crying. Mother dried my tears and we left again so that Irene could go on with her work.

That evening we were both very quiet and mother cried a little, drank heavily and a lot and looked again at the old pictures with baby Jan, half read aloud dad's letters from the war and cried again. I was very quiet and let my tears run down my cheeks only very softly, so that mother would not be even more sad. I soon went to bed and undressed almost entirely by myself; Mother was amazed and laughed at how well I had learned to do that. Then she turned off the light and continued to cry, I cuddled up to her very tightly, but she didn't want to fuck now and cried a lot.

Later we fucked yet, she stroked very gently my butt and said quietly crying, I am her dearest one and all, and I said she is also my everything, how dear I would love her and gave my best while fucking. But Mom said, "Please be very sweet to me today, don't be so wild!" and then stopped crying because I made every effort and fucked her very gently and sweetly. When she had shaken and wiggled a bit and I straightened up to squirt, she held me very gently and lightly while I squirted softly and carefully inside her, not at all wild and hard. Now she didn't cry at all and fell asleep even before I did.

A few days later the terrible thing happened, and I always have to cry when it comes back to my mind. Mother let in the big man who had been with us a few times before and whom we had been expecting. Irene had gone to the sea with a man to work, so I couldn't go down to her, so I was already waiting on the balcony and quietly closed the balcony door from the outside, hiding behind the curtain as usual and peering in through the crack. We were afraid of this man, because he was so tall that he had to bend down in the doorway and always forced mother first to lick his cock and then to let him fuck her very hard. He then always pulled the cock out, wiggled it with his hand and squirted on mother's chest or in her face. But he paid good money for it, mother said.

He put the money on the dresser, Mother pulled the dress apart and knelt down, taking the man's cock out of his pants with a serious face and sucking on it. The big man stood there staring at the ceiling, grunted like a pig and tore a bit at mother's hair, pulling her head back. They went to the bed, the man lay backwards, and Mother sat down on his big cock to ride it.

Mother had once told me that that was why she feared him so much, because he fucked her much too hard and she got dizzy, so bad the man wanted to fuck her. That's why she would rather ride him, even though she didn't otherwise didn't like that at all, just as much as she didn't like sucking cock. Often mother succeeded in riding and the man squirted quite hard inside her hole and on the butt, because he slipped out, the rough dog, but he then always went grinning, without fucking mother so badly. But if she didn't succeed, then she had to lie on her back and he fucked her really badly until she screamed softly and then he pulled out his cock and squirted on her with his hand. Sometimes, however, he would leave his cock inside and pumped everything firmly into her hole, so that Mama needed a long time afterwards to wash his mucus out of herself. He was a rough dog, she said, and we were afraid of the next time.

Now mommy was riding up and down on the man very fast and hard, I saw his sack bouncing up and down and the cock poking in between her butt cheeks. After a very long time mom got tired of riding and bouncing, slowed down and stopped. The man was furious and turned her backwards onto the bed. His cock stood large and powerful, the thick, dark red glans in front. Mom straightened up and tried to wag it with her hand. But he pushed her hand aside, pushed Mom's legs apart with his paws, and looked at her vagina for a long time, then he stuck it in furiously and began to thrust at her violently.

Mama had her eyes closed and her lips pressed tightly together, he thrust hard like a buffalo or a whale and mama was tossed back and forth. He was getting wilder and wilder and Mama was squirming and screaming softly with each thrust. I saw the man in profile through the curtain gap, saw his huge cock as he dripped into Mama's cleft and Mama writhing, so badly was the man fucking her. Mom was being tossed back and forth very hard and soon she was just whimpering softly, then she fell silent and he continued to fuck her hard like a lifeless doll and I hoped he would soon squirt and disappear, the rough dog.

He straightened up, remained motionless and I saw his cock now twitching violently and he was pumping everything into Mom, although she didn't like that either. Then I saw the man's hand dart down and all the blood and he stabbed Mom and I screamed at the top of my lungs, tore open the balcony door and lunged at the rough dog and pushed him with my head away from Mama who was writhing on the bed. I slipped beside the man and kept screaming like a lion, and the man was screaming too.

Jumping up, I spun again and rammed my head into his stomach, pushing him away and back with all my might, and saw the man stumble back onto the balcony and set after him, bumping my bloody head into his stomach again — and then he toppled over the balcony railing, screaming, and disappeared into the terrible depths. I felt a sharp pain in my face for the first time and saw blood dripping down my nose onto the floor. I put step before step and carefully looked over the railing into the depths. There the man lay like a smashed doll on the ground, now some passers‐by gathered around him.

Mama, Gotfatha, what about Mama! I staggered into the room, there lay Mama writhing in pain on the bloody sheet, whimpering. The blood ran from my forehead over my eyes and I felt dizzy, I couldn't help mom and Gotfatha, please, what could I do now? Completely dazed, I kept yelling "One blood! One blood!" and finally got the door open, ran forward to the landing and shouted, "One blood! The mommy!" until I just croaked hoarsely and the men came, green‐uniformed knights, with rifles in their hands. One held me close while two others went ahead and pointed the rifles around the living room. Then white‐robed men came and carried Mom down on a stretcher.

The policeman who had held me down helped me to stand up and looked rather amazed when he saw my tiny little arms. Then a man dressed in white came and stuck a lot of plaster on my forehead and made a soft wrap around it, then he said to the policeman that they would have to stitch it up right away at the hospital. I felt quite sick, the policeman just took me in his arms and carried me down. I was afraid, but I was very dizzy and the policeman put me in his car, which drove very fast through the streets. I didn't quite get it and fell asleep a little bit.

Then at the hospital, a white‐coated man came into the bright room where the policeman was waiting with me. He poked me in the arm, and then I got even more dizzy and almost fell asleep. The white coat pricked and pressed my forehead and then made a new bandage. Turning to the policeman, he said, "A smooth cut, heal soon." Then he pinched me kindly in the cheek and left. I looked after him and asked, "Where's Mommy?" The policeman said that Mommy was in an operating room and we could visit her later.

I was still dazed and nauseous, that's how scared I was. "Am Afraid, Mr. Policeman," I said winging my head and staring at the door. He thought and asked, "Your mother is just a few floors up, and she'll be fine soon, then you can visit her. What are you afraid of?" I thought how he could ask so stupidly and pointed to the door with one little arm, "The rough dog, Mr. Policeman, the rough dog!" He looked at me in amazement, then asked, "What rough dog, Jan?" The doctor had asked my name and how old I was, so now everyone knew. That I was twelve and still one hand.

I told the policeman that the rough dog was the big man who fucked my mother so badly and then fell into the dangerous depths. The policeman was very patient and smoked many, many cigarettes, asked more and more questions. Whether the rough dog had often been with mother, and also other men, but I didn't really know anymore, because mother had inculcated in me that I wasn't allowed to talk to anyone about work and men, and certainly not about our fucking, or fucking with Irene, because the others didn't like that and found it terribly bad. I said nothing and kept looking at the door.

But the policeman kept asking, and I explained to him that the rough dog had fucked the mommy quite badly, although she does not like it at all and screams loudly, but the man is very big and strong. Then I looked to the door, because I was very afraid. Now the policeman said that the big man will surely never come back. He nodded very seriously to this and repeated, "He will never, never again!"

I believed it, "Then I am glad, because I am very afraid of the rough dog!" Little by little I told him everything, that he fucked mommy so badly and she didn't want it, she screamed and he suddenly stabbed her with the knife and I also screamed and headbutted him, but he stabbed me in the head with the knife. Then I paused and the policeman added: "And then he fell down from the balcony" I nodded and I was very sad because I remembered mommy and the blood and I cried.

The policeman wrote everything in his book and then went to make a phone call. Later he came back and said that the woman Sabine from the welfare would take me to a home. Then he turned around again in the doorway and came back, stroked my head and said, "You're a brave guy, Jan, well‐behaved protecting your mom!" I beamed and asked for the hundredth time when I would get to Mommy, but he thought long and hard and said the Mrs. Sabine would take me to her later. He gave me another friendly pinch on the cheek, then went and left me alone.

I waited a long time, a woman brought me tea and bread, but I could not put the bread in my mouth, so she had to stay and feed me. Then came Mrs. Sabine, very old and wrinkled, listened to everything and was very sad when I told her about the rough dog, about the terrible fucking, how I pushed him and he flew off the balcony. And whether we could finally go to mother now. Mrs. Sabine sighed deeply and led me out by the hand, we climbed up and down many steps and passed many people and doors.

Then we reached a room, there was a bed and someone was lying on it covered up. Mrs. Sabine stood there with me, then a gentleman in a white robe came and seemed to me to be the Gotfatha, the one with the long beard and the black glasses. He said to us, "I'm sorry!" and pulled back the cloth, and there lay Mother sleeping. I ran over and hugged her, but she was all cool and didn't wake up. Mrs. Sabine dragged me away and said that mother was now in a better life and with the angels.

The Gotfatha was at first astonished, then he looked at me more closely and nodded to himself. "Your mother was very brave, but then she fell asleep, forever, and is with the angels!" He cleared his throat and covered the mother with the cloth again. I was dazed and in tears cried out to the Gotfatha, what should I do without mother? But he went out without a word and Mrs. Sabine said that she would take me to a nice home with the nuns and there I would have a nice life. I cried and screamed that I wanted to go to mother, but then she pointed again to the covered body and whispered that poor mother had had to suffer a lot because the bad man had stung her, but now she was gone, unfortunately gone forever and could not wake up, come to her Jan.

"Gone, like father!" I sobbed in despair and Mrs. Sabine nodded. I cried for a long time and she held me warmly and tightly, letting my tears drip onto her blouse. Then we were to say goodbye to Mother. I looked at Mrs. Sabine in amazement, but then said artfully, "Goodbye, Mother!" and cried again. She pulled me away by the hand, for she had another appointment, which I did not understand, but it meant that we both had to walk fast.

While we waited for the cab, Mrs. Sabine gossiped with the woman at the reception desk about the convent where we were going. The woman said that this convent was already a little strange, had broken away from Rome and was now a reception center for all sorts of sisters, those who opposed the church or otherwise refused obedience. Some are said to have broken their vows and not even secretly, just think! Strange is the convent, very strange indeed; in fact, strictly speaking, it would no longer be a convent at all. Mrs. Sabine sighed and said that this was true, but one had no choice as a caretaker where to take the children. Besides, because of her, the sisters may be anything but good nuns, but they are simply the only ones who have a place and a heart for the many orphans in times like these. And she didn't really care what happened at night, the main thing was that she could safely house another poor worm. Later she sat down with me in a car and the man drove us through all the streets, driving on and on, and then stopped in front of a very big house.